There he is folks! The bloodthirsty and totally terrifying bounty hunter of the stars: Marty. Huh. You kind of thought he’d have a tougher sounding name like “Krushqor” or “Starcrusher” or even “Craig”. Craig can be a sinister name. But “Marty”? Huh. Odd. Kind of goofy really. And that outfit! Who are you trying to intimidate, Marty, Target employees? Maybe space aliens just fear different things. I mean, they travel at warp factor 9 across the universe, jump through Mass Effect relays, and third sci-fi space travel reference! If I lived in space it’d be hard to find something that intimidated me too. I mean once you’ve seen a red giant go supernova, what else is there? Double meatloaf night? Well yes, but shut up- I’m trying to make a point.
Seriously, though, folks. Stay away from geese. Those are some mean sons of guns. They hiss too. They’re hissing birds. They sound like the dinosaur from Jurassic Park that Linda Blair’d all up in Newman’s face but they FLY TOO. I will allow you a minute to change your underwear. People on rowing teams, you know, those people whose upper torsos resemble a cross between a gorilla and a redwood tree, yeah- they know not to mess with geese or swans. These are guys and girls who scoff at Newtonian physics and say “Yeah I can make a vehicle in syrup go 45 miles an hour” but when geese are on the pond, they might as well be…well, me. That is to say, a fat pale guy with no athleticism besides curling into a fetal position at an impressive rate. Point and case, a piece of lint just blew across the carpet and I thought it was a spider so please allow me a minute to change my underwear.
Things are gonna get pretty fast paced here at Ninja and Pirate as the chase begins! Marty tracks down Grey Al! Doctor Whoo tracks down Marty! Ninja tracks down…I dunno, his pants or something probably. Anyway, thanks to everyone who reads this comic! I hope you all enjoy it and it’s recent drastic changes. They’ve been taking their toll on me but I think overall it is a vast improvement. I like the new layout and the addition of color. Anyway, it’s about 2:00 so I’m gonna head to bed. See you next Wednesday for a Thanksgiving Ninja and Pirate and then we’re off to the races!